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Monday, October 28, 2013

XOXOXO FOR LOVE & GHOSTS

The Family Ghosts


In honor of Halloween, I thought I would share with you three ghost stories. I love ghost stories and I guess I'm not alone with the number of ghost programs that are on TV these days. I swear if there was a channell devoted just to those, I'd watch. Just counting some what is available (and I'm sure I've missed several):

Dead Files (personal fav)
Paranormal State
The Ghost Inside My Child
Stalked By a Ghost
Attacked By a Ghost
The Haunted
The Haunting of
Ghost Hunters
Ghost Hunters International
My Celebrity Ghost Stories
Ghost Stories Caught on Camera
...and a lot more.

I'd like to share with you three of my family's ghost stories. Probably most in my extended family don't even know them. Some in my immediate family may not know them. I share them  because one of my pet peeves about so many of the above mentioned shows is that everything is very black or white. The fact of the matter is, we are all spirits. We are spirits incarnate (in the body) and those that have past out of the physical realm (or maybe never entered the physical realm) are disembodied (out of the physical body). Just like people we meet everyday, not everyone is good and not everyone is bad. I firmly believe that "spirits" are simply on a different plane and that it is probably a blessing we don't see them. There are plenty of people in the body I don't want to see everyday, let alone those that are dead.

Additionally in sharing this narrative, this is in no way trying to convince anyone who is a skeptic that ghosts exist. If that is where you are in your personal journey than far be it from me to change your perspective although I've always felt that the skeptic's path is a cowardly one. It's far easier to say something doesn't exist and walk away then to open one's mind to the possiblility. After all, I know that ultraviolet and infrared light exists. I know air exists. I can't see either with my naked eye.

The first story involves my grandmother (see Jenny's Homefront Strategy) when she was in her 20's. This was smack dab in the middle of WWII and like many of that time, her older brother was fighting in Europe. One night she woke up and felt his presence at the end of her bed. She didn't see him nor did she hear him, but she knew he was there. The next day, the family got the notice that her older brother Bill had been killed.

Fast forward to 1981. I was very lucky to have not only grandparents on both sides but great-grandparents. Great Grandma and Grandpa H were very much the center of our extended family and had been married for well over 60+ years. Great Grandpa H passed from this world. He lived a good long life, especially when you realized he was born in 1898. A year passed. My grandfather, the above Jenny's husband and GG H's eldest son had a second heart attack that landed him in the hospital. As we were told by my grandmother at the kitchen table up at the farm, Great Grandma H had been awaken by her dog Bengy barking in the middle of the night. GG H got up to turn on the light and when she did, she saw the ghost of her husband staring out the window. Now, keep in mind my Great Grandma H was a farmer's wife and not prone to flights of fancy and additionally, it was initially the dog that awoke her. But sure as you and I are on this planet at this moment, there was Great Grandpa H,  who had passed away a year ago, staring out the window. 
Missy


Now fast forward to a year ago, this is my own personal ghost story. My beloved cat Missy simply disappeared from sight for a week. This was totally unlike her. Missy was a wonderful cat and we had a very special bond. I always said that if Missy was a human she'd be me and if I were a cat, I'd be Missy. I found Missy hiding behind my bed. It was clear something was wrong so I took her to the vet. Two vets and an operation later, I had to make the horrible choice to have my much loved cat put to sleep. She had gotten to the point where she couldn't eat and breathe at the same time. We discovered that my furry baby had brain cancer and the tumour was actually pushing the palate of her mouth over her throat making her choose between eating and breathing. I was heartbroken. I still greive for this cat.

A year goes by. In addition to Missy, we had two other cats at this time, Tux and Tribble. We raised Tux from a kitten and she and my husband had a special bond. When we were choosing kittens, she walked right up to my husband as though to say, you're mine. Tux was very much a lady, who crossed her front paws when she walked. We loved her dearly. One day she came up to me and I was shocked to see how thin she had become. A vet trip and tests came back with a dire diagnosis, she had kidney disease. Kidney disease in cats doesn't get better. We bought her special food and thought for a while that she was doing fine. Then it became apparent that her kidneys were shutting down. It was horrible to watch and we felt like we were on a death watch but we had made the decision that, unlike poor Missy, Tux would die at home where her loved ones where and she felt comfortable. At least that was the plan. It finally became apparent that she was really suffering when she couldn't even jump on the bed and sleep with us like she used to or just sit without falling over. We made the horrible decision to take her to the vet and put her to sleep. She was 16 years old. (About 80-90 years old human years). 

Tux

I don't mind telling you that night I sobbed like a baby. My cats are my furry children. They are part of our family. In the middle of the night, I felt a cat walk up on my body and then proceed to walk between the bodies of my husband and myself. Now there are only two cats that walk between my husband and myself, Missy, who had been dead a year and Tux. Tribble sleeps at the head of the bed and will literally jump over my head to get to my husband. So, I assumed this was Tux and that somehow she made it on the bed from the floor where I had seen her lay. I reached down to comfort her and pet her, only.... there was no cat there. Then I felt my husband's hand come down to pet the cat. He had felt the cat too. The cat had bumped her head into his side just as both Tux and Missy did. I sat up. There was no cat there. I got up and turned on the light. Poor Tux was lying at the floor, really pretty much unable to move. She  just where she was when I went to bed. It was then I knew that it had been Missy.

So what is the lesson from these stories? Simply this; our loved ones want us to know that they are ok and that simply because they are out of the body doesn't mean that they ceased to exist. Additionally, the lesson of Great Grandpa H and Missy was that our loved ones come back for us at the end of our lives to take us to the next world. Missy came back for Tux. Her message to me was, "Mom, I'm ok. It's time for Tux to leave this world and I came back to take her back with me. It's ok, I'm here for her, you can let go." Great Grandpa H's and Jenny's brother was the same. Physical death hadn't ended their existence. They were still in existence and they were coming back to let their loved ones know this and with GG H's case, to help his son cross. To me, there is nothing "para" normal about this. It's very normal. It's called LOVE. I'm very comforted to know that when my time comes, those I've loved that have passed will meet me to take me to my next journey. And I think this is beautiful. Have a blessed Halloween.

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